Seeing Through Human Nature Matters More Than Being a Good Person

Of power, wealth and worldly splendor, he who keeps aloof is pure; he who dwells among them yet is unstained is purest of all.

Of cunning, trickery and scheming, he who knows them not is lofty; he who knows them yet does not use them is loftiest of all.

— Cai Gen Tan (Conversations of a Vegetable Root)

In Dream of the Red Chamber there is a couplet: "Understanding the ways of the world is itself learning; mastering human relations is itself literature."

As a father, I rarely teach my children notions like "good is rewarded with good, evil with evil." From my limited decades of life experience, the idea that virtue is always rewarded is not necessarily correct. Human nature is inherently flawed: it easily forgets kindness, easily nurses grudges, and is easily tempted by fame, wealth and gain at the expense of morality. Expecting good to be rewarded with good does not conduce to inner peace; rather, seeing through the weaknesses of human nature makes it far easier to remain unruffled in any situation.

As early as the Jin and Song dynasties, the eminent monk Daosheng boldly put forward the ideas that "good deeds do not bring reward" and that "even the icchantikas (those deemed utterly irredeemable in Buddhism) can attain Buddhahood"—views that openly challenged the Buddhist establishment of his time.

I admire Master Daosheng's candor. It is true: good is not always rewarded with good, and evil people may yet attain enlightenment. The world is unpredictable, and the turning between good and evil often lies in a single thought. If one believes too strongly in the power of morality, one cannot avoid falling into countless interpersonal traps.

Master Daosheng was more like an existentialist than an idealist within Buddhism. The existentialist acknowledges and accepts imperfect reality; the idealist seeks to remake the world into an ideal state. Practice has shown that human society can never be remade into an ideal commonwealth.

As an individual, I strive to hold fast to various moral bottom lines, but honestly speaking, this holding is sometimes sorely tested, and I do not pass every such test. I believe the overwhelming majority of people in this world are in the same position as I.

I hope to pass such tests one hundred percent, because each time I fail one, a scar is left in the depths of my heart. That scar reminds me from time to time that my conduct has been stained, and such a reminder is not a pleasant thing. I even suspect that everyone, when facing such situations, more or less like me harbors guilt and heaviness deep within.

I would rather let my children see clearly that these flaws of human nature exist commonly among people—not only in others, but in ourselves as well. Since such flaws exist, the so-called reward of good for good and evil for evil is not necessarily correct.

When we associate with others, we should not have overly high expectations, because high expectations usually bring deep disappointment. If we can recognize that human nature is flawed, and that we ourselves and others—or rather, others and ourselves alike—are driven by human weaknesses and make various imperfect choices, then when unpleasant things happen we can release those negative emotions from a place of sympathy and understanding, and thereby achieve forgiving others and letting go of resentment. Resentment is one of the great sources of human spiritual suffering; Buddhism calls it "ill will" (dvesha), and it is the vice hardest for people to abandon.

Buddhism emphasizes "the simultaneous practice of compassion and wisdom." A person with only compassion has solved only half of the spiritual problem; the other half requires this wisdom that sees through human nature. Only by seeing through can one truly let go. If one cannot see through, one can never truly let go; if inwardly one has not seen through, then even if outwardly one is gentle and yielding, the heart remains entangled and preoccupied. The heart is a small space; if it is long occupied by negative emotions, spiritual joy and happiness are far out of reach.

Therefore, it is better that we know all the tricks people play—deception, delusion, underhanded schemes, and so on, the so-called cunning and contrivances. To reach the state of a discerning eye that sees everything at a glance would be even more ideal. Understanding these tricks is not for the purpose of using them, but so that when others use them against us we may dodge them as much as possible, while also understanding, sympathizing with, and forgiving that person to the greatest extent—because this person, unable to escape his own human wickedness, lives a defective life and does not yet understand what a truly happy life is.